FOUNDATION PART II

Unless the LORD builds the house, they labor in vain who build it. Unless the LORD watches over the city, the watchman guards it in vain. 

Psalm 127:1   [A Song of Ascents. By Solomon.]  (NH)

 GOD IS THE ROCK UPON WHOM OUR FOUNDATION IS BUILT

If the cornerstone is solid and the foundation is firm a person will be able to stand in the storms of life.

Isaiah 28:16

Therefore thus says the Lord God,

“Behold, I am laying in Zion a stone, a tested stone,

A costly cornerstone for the foundation, firmly placed.

He who believes in it will not be disturbed.

I found on my journey that no matter how much knowledge I had, that if my foundation was not firm or built upon love, with Jesus as the cornerstone, that I was unable to stand firm in the midst of life's storms.
 

If you spent some time with yourself every day or every week getting to know your own spirit, you might also find that there is so much more to this life than just this physical world. I made it my life's effort because my very life depended upon me learning how to get in touch with my own spirit. Even if you only spent a few hours a week journaling, sitting quietly, learning to feel what is inside of you and learning some new skills, your life could change dramatically. Even only changing your nutritional habits could do wonders. You will get out of your life and your spirit rewards equal to the amount of effort that you put into yourself. The rewards were way worth the effort for me and although difficult at times, my recovery was never as hard as being in emotional pain.
 

Basically, think about what would help your body, your mind and your spirit to get better. For the mind, maybe try learning new skills or new ways of thinking and behaving. Try mindfulness or DBT to help you learn coping skills to help reduce your stress levels. For the body, try eating healthier, drinking fresh vegetable juices, eat a healthy breakfast, cut out the fast food and get some exercise. Many of us have jobs inside these days so getting out or to the gym might help a great deal. For the spirit, take an art class, write or draw, sit and talk to God or find some emotional support. The possibilities are endless but try to balance your life out a bit. Start with small changes and see if some of these make a difference. It might take some time but you will eventually find what works for you. Consider all of this an adventure and that the treasure to be found is your life and getting in touch with your spirit.
 

I attempted my recovery using a mind, body and spirit approach. I did not do all of this at once, I slowly started doing little things in each area. For example, I never ate a lot of processed foods but I didn't eat enough vegetables so I added in more vegetables and salads. I started reading spiritual books to help me develop a personal relationship with God. I started learning how to feel my feelings so that I could get in touch with my spirit more. I explored natural remedies for depression. I explored different or alternative methods of healing such as massage, acupuncture, naturopathy, cleansing and detoxifying, flower essences, Rescue Remedy (Bach), working with my body's energies, shiatsu and other methods. I bought and used extensively books on natural healing. I took long walks in the mountains. I took a wilderness course to help build confidence, have some fun and learn something new. I studied the ego and the Buddhist teachings on suffering and attachment, among other things. Later I added learning new skills for healthier communication and coping. I tried to address all aspects of my spirit and my life and to put them in balance but I had to work through the methods a little at a time to discover what worked for me. Some methods worked but I didn't like them. Some worked well and so I stuck with those for my own program.

The more that I used alternative methods and the more skills that I learned, the less I needed the medication or other substances to block out my feelings. I grew stronger and stronger over the years by learning to be comfortable with my feelings, with life, with others and to trust again. As a result of my experiences I was able to slowly get off of the medication and switch to natural remedies and foods to help me recover and heal. Bach Rescue Remedy works well for anxiety as do green leafy foods and vegetable juices. Fresh pineapple and the enzymes it contains works great for inflammation of any kind in the body. Getting rid of the old energies worked very well as that helped me to be less depressed since there was less "stuff" inside of me. Initially it took me six months of doing energy work, cleansing and drinking juices and one step forward, two back, before I had an afternoon where I felt great for a couple of hours. It was only a short time but as I continued my efforts I started to see two steps forward and only one back, then three forward and only one back. It was enough to give me hope and keep me going. Learning new skills and being able to express what I was feeling and be real made a huge difference and really helped reduce the depression and frustration.
 

I wanted God to be more than just mere words or out there somewhere. That was no longer enough for me and enough for life. Life got too hard and mere words that He was there were no longer enough. I needed to be able to really feel His love. I never thought that He made me to need medication for the rest of my life. I thought if I could feel all the fear and the pain then I surely could feel God if He was love. I just kept looking outside of me instead of going inside and developing a personal relationship with God. I was so cut off from myself and from others and I didn't have much love in my life. I don't see God. I feel God and His love. I can tell you that it is possible to have this kind of a connection with something bigger than ourselves. It's quite comforting actually, to know that there is something bigger than me. What a relief! I cannot tell you how to make this connection for that is something that you will have to do for yourself. I can tell you that learning to feel, getting rid of the fear and replacing it with love, makes a huge difference. You don't need anything but LOVE to connect with God, except perhaps faith and a belief that He exists. I don't know all of the answers but He is real to me now.
 

I was afraid of God, men and anger. I had been betrayed, beaten, stalked and almost killed, among other things, and thus I was scared of people and relationships. I felt that I had inadequate skills and that I was unable to connect with anyone in any kind of meaningful relationship. I went everywhere BUT to God for my healing first. I used a lot of science and different methods for my recovery and healing because I was afraid of love and afraid of people to the point where I no longer felt safe with anyone or with love. It took me a long time to get past my fears and let Him love me which was the most important part of my recovery. I wish I had done it sooner but I cannot go back and so I hope that you can learn from my efforts. Love and support were the most important parts of my recovery. I could not have done it otherwise.

I found that better quality nutrition, including fresh vegetable juices, helped me to feel a lot better. Exercise helped me to handle stress better and helped my physical body. Learning new communication and coping skills helped me to communicate better and be less frustrated and depressed. Spirituality helped me to find a connection with my own self and well as a better connection that I had ever found with God in the religion I grew up with and I felt a lot less guilty and afraid of Him. Natural ways of eating and supplements helped me to get off of the medication. Getting in touch with my feelings and being less afraid of them and more accepting helped me to get in touch with my spirit and what it as trying to tell me. Being able to be real for the first time in my life greatly influenced and uplifted my spirit.
 

This approach is all outlined in much more detail in the book but this is the basic approach for now and I hope it helps. I recognize that there isn't much detail here and I will try to add more as I go but it is all explained much better and in way more detail in the book.
 

I tried to keep all aspects of my life in balance to the best of my ability. I lagged behind in my physical body but since I have become stronger emotionally and mentally I have begun to address the physical more intensely to catch up with the rest of me. Balance it all to the best of your ability. For example, I was not able to eat all raw food to start but I added as many fresh foods and vegetable juices that I could to my diet. Meat might help one person feel stronger while another may not care to eat it. Find what works for you. Nutrition plays a BIG part in my physical and emotional wellbeing.
 

Fear and a lot of old energies kept me from working on my physical body too much because of the emotional releases but once I became stronger mentally and emotionally I was able to focus more on helping my body recover. Spirituality and a connection with love and God helped me find my life source again. Learning new skills helped me be stronger emotionally. I didn't do all of this all at once. It took me a while to look at this information and put together my own program.

THESE BOOKS WERE THE FOUNDATION FOR MY APPROACH:
 

Anderson, Richard, Cleanse and Purify Thyself: Book One, The Cleanse, Mt. Shasta, CA, Christobe Publishing, 2000.
 

Anderson, Richard, Cleanse and Purify Thyself: Book Two, Secrets of Radiant Health & Energy, Mt. Shasta, CA., Christobe Publishing, 2000.
 

Arlin, Dini, & Wolfe, Nature’s First Law: The Raw-Food Diet, San Diego, CA, Maui Brothers Publishing, 2000.
 

Balch, James F. and Phyllis A., Prescription for Nutritional Healing, Second Edition, Garden City Park, NY, Avery Publishing Group, 1997.
 

Barody, Theodore A., Alkalize or Die, Waynesville, NC, Holographic Health Press, 1991.
 

Bradshaw, John, Healing the Shame That Binds You, Deerfield Beach, FL, Health Communications, Inc., 2005.
 

Dale, Cyndi, New Chakra Healing, St. Paul, MN, Llewellyn Publications, 1996.

Eden, Donna, Energy Medicine, Use Your Body’s Energies To: Boost your vitality and stamina, Strengthen your immune system, Relieve pain and common complaints such as colds and tension headaches, Sharpen your memory and mind, Keep yourself healthy and balanced with a five-minute routine, New York, NY, Penguin Putnam, 1998.

Concerning matter, we have been all wrong. What we have called matter is energy, whose vibration has been so lowered as to be perceptible to the senses. There is no matter.

                                                          -Albert Einstein

Drawing and writing in a journal are also some excellent ways to help us get in touch with our spirits and what we are feeling as well as to remove the energies from our bodies. I used both of these methods extensively and I still use them today.

 

Estes, Clarissa Pinkola, Women Who Run With the Wolves, New York, NY, Ballantine Books, 1992. This is a woman's book of stories - for the guys I would suggest checking out some of Sam Keen's work - maybe Fire in the Belly, On Being a Man or Iron John: A Book about Men by Robert Bly.

Goldman, Jonathan, Healing Sounds, The Power of Harmonics, Rockport, MA, Element Books, Inc., 1992.
 

Hanh,Tich Nhat, The Heart of the Buddha’s Teaching: Transforming Suffering Into Peace, Joy and Liberation: The Four Noble Truths, New York, NY, Broadway Books, 1998.

Hay, Louise L., Heal Your Body, The Mental Causes for Physical Illness and the Metaphysical Way to Overcome Them, Carlsbad, CA, Hay House, Inc., 1988.
 

Jensen, Bernard, Tissue Cleansing Through Bowel Management, Escondido, CA, Bernard Jensen International, 1981.
 

Kramer, Peter, Listening to Prozac, The Landmark Book about Anti-depressants and the Remaking of the Self, New York, NY, Penguin Books, 1993.
 

Levine, Peter with Frederick, Ann, Waking the Tiger: Healing Trauma, Berkeley, CA, North Atlantic Books, 1997.
 

Page, Linda, Linda Page’s Healthy Healing, United States of America, Traditional Wisdom, Inc., 2000.

I used a lot, I mean lots and lots, of ENERGY WORK TO HELP ME LEARN TO FEEL AGAIN. I have spent thousands of hours working with the energies and feelings in my own body for I find it fascinating and amazing. I work with my own energy and God's love as the basis for learning to feel, recovering and feeling what energies are inside of me. Love is the most healing force that I have ever found. I do not work with any energy practitioners. Learning to feel was a big thing for me since I had shut myself down from feeling anything for the most part. The following book was very helpful in helping me learn how to feel again; 

 Patten, Terry and Leslie, Biocircuits: Amazing New Tools for Energy Health, (publishing info unknown) 1998],  

All I could really feel was pain anymore. I had stuffed myself out and so far down that pain was the only thing that got my attention. So, in an effort to clear out the old suppressing energies and release me from the fear, anger, grief and trauma, I started very slowly to learn how to FEEL what I was feeling and how I thought about my feelings. By going into what I was feeling I was able to get in touch with my own spirit that I had stuffed down and begin to find out how I really felt and why I felt so suppressed and compromised, which led to severe depression. It was a severe suppression of myself and what I was feeling. I feel that this was a key issue for me but I don't know about you. It was how I found out how I really felt inside. I talk about this subject in the book in detail but there are other ways to get in touch with your spirit than energy work if you do not find it appealing. Just sitting and being and trying to listen to what is going on with yourself helps a great deal.
 

Pert, Candace B., Molecules of Emotion, New York, NY, Touchstone, 1997.
 

Slagle, Priscilla, The Way Up From Down, New York, NY, Random House, 1987.
 

Wolfe, David, The Sunfood Diet Success System, San Diego, CA, Maui Brothers Publishing, 2000.
 

I later signed up for an outpatient program and learned a lot of new skills and healthier ways of believing and relating to others. This made a big, big difference in how I felt and as a result the depression lessened a lot after that. It took me about one year for what I was learning to start to all come together and for me to start putting it together in my life. It took another six months for me to feel much more comfortable with my new skills. I work on these communication, coping and relating skills every day. These skills helped me to be able to be real, to let others know where I stand, to set boundaries, to handle anger and conflict better (but that is my hardest challenge), to have less stress and feel more confident, among other things. Everything worked together - nutrition, exercise, spirituality, skills and everything else to help me recover and all of it made a tremendous difference in my life.
 

Later I added the following books since another dimension had been added to the battle. 

The Bible. I grew up hearing and reading from the Bible but I never started to study it until later in life. I discovered that it helped me a great deal to stay calm and to renew my mind, as well as keep negative thoughts away. I even slept with it on my chest many a night. Studying the Bible gives us a lot of great examples of life situations we face today and how to handle them or listen to God and helps me learn to know God and His ways.

Ingram, Chip, The Invisible War, What Every Believer Needs To Know About Satan, Demons and Spiritual Warfare, Grand Rapids, MI, Baker Books, 2006.
 

Phillips, Ron, Everyone’s Guide to Demons & Spiritual Warfare, Simple Powerful Tools for Outmaneuvering Satan in Your Daily Life, Lake Mary, FL, Charisma Media/Charisma House Book Group, 2010.

A person can also find lots and lots of spiritual prayers on the internet to help remove negative entities.

I also added the following book after most of the old energies and the trauma had been removed because my physical body was still suffering. I was unable to cleanse and eat so many raw foods because of the intensity of the emotional releases due to the trauma and other energies held inside. Although I already knew the power of juicing, raw foods and cleansing, someone told me about this book and I have found it to be very beneficial. I am using this method (modified) now in an attempt to help my physical body recover.
 

Clean foods such as juices and raw foods accelerate emotional releases and clean the body while comfort foods can slow or stop emotional releases and relieve emotional discomfort. This program focuses on the nutritional power of foods as given to us by God, concentrated nutrition in the form of juices, especially fresh vegetable juices, no added salt and detoxification. Cleaner burning foods help the energy and life force in our bodies move better and in a healthier manner. Foods that clog our system or excess weight slow down the energy and can make it sluggish and the body diseased and unhealthy. I found that what I ate was directly related to my emotional state of health. The more upset I was the more comfort foods I reached for to help me slow down or blunt my feelings. If I am feeling strong and comfortable, I reach for healthier foods.

Try experimenting on your own with different foods to see how they affect your body. Eat one food at a time when you do this experiment. For example, eat a peach or a banana or some other kind of fruit and pay attention to how you feel. Later, eat a heavier meal or meat. How does your stomach feel? Does it feel light and clean or does the food make you full and sluggish and sleepy? When you eat salad are you still hungry and looking for more or is it enough? Think also about the energy of each food that you are putting into your body. Foods full of life such as fruits and vegetables and raw foods have more life energy. Processed foods, sugar and meat are dead, lifeless and can make you feel sluggish. Live foods give your body life and are full of enzymes. Dead foods will not give your body as much life and can clog up the system.
 

Think about the energy of the animal you are ingesting if you eat meat. What are the characteristics of each animal because those energies are reflected in what you are eating - believe it or not. Animals that are full of fear when killed have put that vibration of fear into the meat that you are eating. Warriors used to ingest the heart of an animal or victim to gain the strength or characteristics of that person or animal. They didn't eat the heart of a fearful or weak animal. There are reasons for that as well. Just try to think about what you are eating, what are the characteristics of that food such as strength and weaknesses and if it will give your body real life or not.
 

The healthier that I eat the less hungry that I am even if I have not consumed many calories per day. If I drink vegetable juices all day then I don't have hunger pangs. My hunger comes from me feeling uncomfortable with what is being released as the clean juices clear out my body. This releases toxins and the energies of feelings from my body. If I eat junk during the day, say on a binge day, it seems I cannot get enough food. This is because I am not giving my body the nutrition that it wants and so it signals hunger because it is looking for good food and the nutrients that it needs. Another reason for this may be that some difficult emotions are surfacing and if I am uncomfortable with them I try to block them out with food. I think that many who eat a lot of junk or processed food and are overweight are really hungry because their bodies are not getting proper nutrition to start. Excess weight happens for many reasons, mostly emotional and lack of proper nutrition, so try to pay attention to what is happening when you go looking for food. You might also be wanting to squish down some feelings, protect yourself from something and insulate yourself from someone, your feelings or the world. Try to bring awareness to what you are eating and why.
 

The following book and program might be of help to those who are seriously or chronically (long time) ill and want some relief. It basically uses lots and lots of fresh vegetable juices to give the body a nutritional punch, not only to help the body with the proper nutrition that it needs for the day but with extra nutrients to help the body heal. It will take a longer time than taking medication but the therapy can help get to the causes and not just get rid of the symptoms.
 

Gerson, Charlotte and Walker, Morton, The Gerson Therapy, The Proven Nutritional Program for Cancer and Other Illnesses, New York, NY, Kensington Publishing Corp., 2006.
 

It might seem that these things took a long time but I figured that I would be two years on down the road no matter what happened. I wanted the rest of my life to be happier and healthier and so I figured that time would pass whether or not I did anything to help myself. I'm glad that I took the time to learn about these other methods and these skills for without doing so I would still be in a very miserable place, if I was still alive. I consider every bit of effort that I made to get better worth every minute of my time.